


What It Takes (To Lose Your Mind)

by dragonwings948



Series: Wonderland [4]
Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (1963), Doctor Who (Big Finish Audio)
Genre: (you can thank Scherzo for that), Audio 018: The Stones of Venice, Audio 052: Scherzo, Fluff, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Hugs, Introspection, New Planets, POV The Doctor (Doctor Who), Planets, Weirdness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-13
Updated: 2020-07-13
Packaged: 2021-03-04 21:46:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 895
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25233367
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dragonwings948/pseuds/dragonwings948
Summary: The Doctor takes Charley to a beautiful new planet. | The Doctor's mind starts to slip away as it melds with Charley's.
Relationships: Eighth Doctor & Charley Pollard
Series: Wonderland [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1814560
Comments: 4
Kudos: 6





	What It Takes (To Lose Your Mind)

_Didn’t it all seem new and exciting?_

_I felt your arms twisting around me_

_It’s all fun and games ’til somebody loses their mind_

**Then...**

_Travelling with someone new makes the universe an entirely different place._

It was the Doctor’s prevailing thought when he took Charley to the planet Harmony as a sort of apology for the Venice trip not going quite as planned. Charley was in the middle of saying something about how she hoped there wouldn’t be evil plots and sinister aliens waiting for them this time, but she stopped in the middle of her sentence as she stepped out of the TARDIS.

The Doctor smiled, watching as she went slack-jawed. Her eyes nearly popped out of her head as she gazed at the world before her. The Doctor had been to this planet so many times, but now, with Charley, it was like seeing it for the first time all over again.

“I…” Charley’s voice trailed off into nothing. She shook her head in amazement. “I don’t know what to say.”

The Doctor followed her gaze. Even with the way he could talk anyone’s ear off, Harmony was a place he had always found impossible to describe. It was like trying to conjure up the most picturesque scene you could think of—and then discarding it because it wouldn’t even come close to matching Harmony’s splendour. The colours that painted the planet didn’t even have names on Earth. He could say the hills were green, but really the colour was a sort of deep emerald. He could try to explain that the river close by was the bluest blue you could think of, but that didn’t cover it. And as for the sunset? Reds, oranges, and yellows didn’t even come close. It was like the sky had been set aflame, tinting the landscape with brilliant brightness.

“It’s called ‘the Jewel of the Universe,’” he said quietly. “Some humans simply call it ‘The Promised Land,’ or even ‘Aphrodite.’ This planet is where the idea of the goddess of beauty came from.”

Charley met his eyes. “Really? How?”

“Oh, it’s a long story.” And the Doctor didn’t quite want to admit that he had been involved in changing history _just_ a little bit.

Charley’s eyes scanned over the landscape again, like she couldn’t help looking at it. “It really is…beautiful. Incredible. Amazing!” She laughed with pure joy as she turned to him. “It’s indescribable. Oh, Doctor, thank you!” She leaped on him in a hug, her arms wrapping tightly around him.

The Doctor was only too happy to return the embrace. He took the moment to reflect that Charley somehow felt so right in his arms, like she was meant to fit there…but the thought passed as quickly as it came.

“If you’re thanking me now, just wait until you try the honey.”

Charley pulled away, frowning at him. “Honey?”

“Oh, yes. There are honey trees which grow leaves that secrete the best honey in the universe. See?” He grabbed her by her shoulders and turned her around, pointing ahead at a tall, sturdy tree. “That’s one right there.”

“What are we waiting for?” She grabbed his hand like it was where hers belonged and tugged him forward.

Her enthusiasm invigorated the Doctor’s spirit for only a moment; because when he glanced over at her with a tinge of red in her cheeks and her hair gently being tousled by the wind, he began to wonder what he would do without Charley Pollard. And that was a very dangerous place to be, because her fate was still uncertain.

But the Doctor pushed the thought away. Because if he ever had to let Charley go, if he had to put her back on the R101, well…

He might just go mad.

* * *

**Now...**

His arms were wrapped around her. Melding with her. Charley twisted around him—she _became_ him—and the Doctor didn’t know which way was up or down or left or right and—

He was gone. His mind was gone. All in a moment, everything he was became everything Charley was. He could sense her in her entirety: all of her memories, her hopes, fears, and dreams.

It occurred to him in a moment—no, it didn’t occur to him, he _knew_ it because he _was_ Charley—that her reason for coming to the Divergent Universe with him hadn’t been selfish at all. She’d been looking out for him like she always had: cleaning his wounds after the fight with Grayle, standing by his side, believing in him, comforting him when he’d thought he didn’t need it, even stabbing him—or, rather, Zagreus—through the heart. She’d always given completely of herself without thought of anything in return. And this action had been no different.

And now that he was looking on himself from the outside, he could see that his act of pushing her away had been the selfish one. He’d wanted to be comforted by knowing she was safe, even when that was never what she’d wanted.

He’d been wrong; how could he tell her that he’d been wrong? It was the most important thing in the universe, and he didn’t want to forget.

But then it all began slipping away, dissolving into something else entirely; something _new,_ something…evolved.

And then the Doctor completely, and literally, lost his mind.


End file.
